Horticulture Creed

Somehow when I think of a creed I think of ethical, perhaps ecological, sustainable beliefs, responsibilities and ideas.  However, I think the creed below is much closer to reality for many of us!


1.     I want it.

2.     I want it all.

3.     I want it now.

4.     If it will not grow in my zone or is prohibitively expensive, I want it most of all.

5.     I am perfectly willing to forego any necessities of life, such as food for my children, in order to have it.

6.      I recognize my horticultural dependency.

7.      I recognize your horticultural dependency.

8.      I will willingly aid and abet your dependency, as you will mine.

9.      This makes us infinitely happy.

10.    Any money saved by virtue of comparison shopping equals found money and therefore is not counted as spending.

11.     If no one else has it, I must have it.

12.     If everyone else has it, I must have it too.

13.  If I have planted everything I’ve purchased, I must immediately buy more plants.